Basket Full of Random

If there is one thing I have learned from The Pratt, it is that one can compile seemingly unrelated and/or meaningless blurbs in a post and it is still readable.
Granted, what works for him, likely will not for me, but I am not letting THAT stop me.

0):
Why?
Because I can.

1):
Michelle, remember these words.
Tattoo them to your forehead.
Repeat them aloud: “Never. Never ever again. Ever.”

2):
Am I supposed to be doing this?
When I am doing digital art, I am frequently heard to mutter:
“STOOpid maCHINE!”
When I am painting, I am most often:
Quiet, prayerful, peaceful, thoughtful, at rest.

Does this mean I am *supposed* to be doing this, or perhaps it is more the natural effects of painting, and many people experience the same?

3):
I know that we credit the Japanese for the invention of the Sumi-e Brush, and that is all good, but honestly, I think that God invented it when He coloured the whole earth.
Surely this is Gods own paintbrush.
It is just THAT perfect.
Goes from fine-point to fat-flat-and-smooth with the flick of a wrist.
Holds lots of paint.

It is perfect.

3b):
But so is chocolate.
When manna fell from heaven, I have a feeling it was Chocolate.
(Of course if you ask Canada, they will say it’s cheese.)

4):
What am I listening to?
Gorilaz-Feel Good Inc.
Ill Harmonics – Banana Republic
Hocus Pick- I’m So Happy.
REM-Shiny Happy People
Pretenders – Back on the Chain Gang.
“ “ “ - Where’d ya go Ohio?
Enya – May it Be.
Annie Lennox – Into the West
Brak – What Day is It?
Devo – Gates of Steel
Devo- Freedom of Choice
Devo – Mongoloid

------Notice------

The use of the number '5' is temporarily suspended until after todays "meeting."

-----End Notice-----

6):
Some friends of mine were recently involved in what we hope will only be a temporary lay-off from their jobs.
The thought occurred to me to pray for their poor wives.
While it IS fun to have your man home for a while, sometimes you say inside your head:

“This is what I DO on Mondays” (or insert other weekday as appropriate).

“Uh, this is my ‘bubble.’ (Draws circle around self with two index fingers) and right now, you are IN my bubble. K?”

“Don’t you have a lawn to mow somewhere?” (!)

Ok well, it usually happens after about a week. Two if you are a good boy.
;o)
(Oh people! Don’t you know a joke when you SEE one?)

But hey! Here is a thought:

Ladies, here is what you can do.
Is your man temporarily finding himself with too many spare moments at home? Is he beginning to cramp your style a tiny bit?
Well, use this extra set of hands and have him:

-Clean out the litter box.
-Clean out his closet and fill a bag for the thrift store. (This may keep him occupied for a full day, just exploring his old junk.)
-Have him scrub the floors. Men usually have greater upper body strength than women, so use it to your advantage. Encourage him to scrub those little spots in the vinyl flooring that you can’t seem to get out with a mop, or on your own.
-How about kill all the end-of-summer garden spiders that like to build webs up under the eaves of the house.

These are all great things that need doing and will keep him occupied on those rare moments when he might be “under foot.”
Maybe offer him a snack and a nap in the afternoon?

NO!
That WAS a terrible rant.
And honestly, it was pretty demeaning and rude.
My apologies for that element.
But it was a free association moment.
Sometimes I can’t help but push the limits of humour.


0): Reprise
Why?
Because I can.